In the fall of 2004, the Bleach Eating Freaks sponsored a contest called Office Bricolage. The goal? Make the best weapon possible using only office supplies. Only items commonly found in a normal office, and tools or items commonly found on a normal person (ie not me) in an office environment. Then, once you've completed your creation, document it's construction and use. Here were the results. Entries were given a score based on originality, destructiveness, technicality, aesthetics, and presentation, with a maximum of five points awarded in each category (total maximum score of 25).

I submitted five entries to the BEF-OB contest. By the way, I should mention that, with the exception of a few paperclips destroyed in early R&D, I purchased all of my own supplies. I think my employer might have had something to say about me sneaking out with several boxes of paperclips, highlighters, ballpoint pens, pencils, and rolls of tape.

Here are my entries, in order of lowest score to highest:

• Bola Grenade (16/25)
• Spiked Fist Load (17/25)
• Strapping Tape Bola (18/25)
• Ball Point Blowgun (19/25)
• Micro-Claymore (23/25)

The Micro-Claymore was also featured on several dozen webfilters, including Fark.com. It also was featured on the February 8, 2005 edition of G4's the Screensavers. Here's a video clip (7.4mb WMV file), courtesy of the BEF. There goes another few moments of my 15 minutes of fame! I'm both disappointed and relieved that someone took the time to film the incredibly lame effects of the mine. From the way some of the weblogs and webfilters were talking, the weapon should only be fired from inside of a concrete bunker five miles away. And even then, there might be risk of radioactive monsters! I could hear the attack lawyers sharpening their claws.

In December of 2004/January of 2005, the BEF hosted Office Bricolage 2. While the contest was generally the same, the scoring was a bit different. See the link for details. This contest was featured on the January 19, 2005 episode of the Screensavers. They seemed to like saying "60 Second Shiv." Here's a video capture (4.94MB WMV) of the segment.

Here are my entries, in order of lowest score to highest:

• 60 Second Shiv (64/100)
• 10 Cent Shuriken (85/100)
• Wire Whip (88/100)

General Disclaimer: These items are potentially dangerous. You could injure yourself or others. Don't make them. Don't use them. Just marvel at my personal stupidity and move on.