When I started out, this was going to be a nasty little parody of bad web cartoonists. You know, the types that produce considerably more excuses than comics, as if we're the ones forcing them to draw the comic in the first place. I set out to create a webcomic composed of nothing but increasingly implausible and personal excuses. There's still a good bit of that in there, with more to come.

Early on, though, I realized that I would need to produce at least a few actual comics to get the ball rolling. There are only so many times I can post a dead link before it just looks like I've had a dramatic server failure. And therein lies my dilemma. See, I have next to no artistic talent whatsoever. AutoCAD is my weapon of choice. Need someone to draw a full floor of ductwork? I'm your man. But ask me to create a recognizable human form? No chance. I can generally bludgeon my obsolete copy of Corel PhotoPaint into more or less doing what I want, but other than that, my artistic abilities arrested in kindergarten.

That's when I hit upon the idea of using SOF-JPEG (SOF="Some Obscure Format"). If I claimed to be using some obscure format, I could get away with producing plausible gibberish.

So you made SOF-JPEG up? You jerk!
Yes. Sorry. I hope you didn't waste too much time searching your Internet Options.

I got the idea from a discussion thread I read a while back. I don't remember the details, but basically a webcomic artist was trying to switch away from using GIFs. As I understand it, the technology to make Graphical Interchange Format images is owned by some fading megacorp. (Who shall remain nameless, to protect me from lawyers with Google access and too much time on their hands.) They put it out there, let it be used for years, and then started suing people when they ran low on funds. (Which is typical of everything that is wrong with tech patents these days, and yet another reason why everyone should support the EFF.) Technically, if you create GIF format images, you owe that company money. Fortunately, this issue has more or less faded from view in recent years.

Anyhow, the artist in question switched to PNG (Portable Network Graphics) format, which is supposedly superior to GIF and effectively free (give or take some legal juggling). The problem was that some older web browsers didn't support it. So many loyal readers were faced with dead image markers where there had been comics last week. Gibberish is more fun than dead links, though, so I simulated trashed images for my bogus format instead.

Okay, fine. But why so many of them?
After the first couple of pseudo-comics, I started adding comments. I wanted to establish the habit, for future use in delivering excuses. And I'm still doing just that.

But, like Bob and Ralph themselves, the more I was exposed to Gravel, the more the project mutated. As the comments became more involved, plotlines and character developments emerged. It became a kind of guided Rorschach test, with the comics helping to wrest meaning out of the blobs of color and noise. In short, I got suckered into my my own scam. I cranked out more and more pseudo-comics, just to see where they took me.

How did you make the SOF-JPEG images?
Originally, I had planned on just scribbling blobs of color in PhotoPaint. But I could never get anything that looked plausible. I couldn't even make convincing abstract noise. How pitiful is that?

So I needed a starting point, at least, that had properly proportioned layouts and general shapes. The source was obvious: other webcomics. From there, I tinkered around until I found an 8 step process that mangled the drawing sufficiently to obscure all detail, yet kept a convincing arrangement of tantalizingly suggestive shapes.

I knew it! I knew [insert comic date here] looked familiar. You thieving bastard!
Well, crap.

See, this is my biggest concern. It's really not my intention to steal credit for anyone's work. In fact, a substantial amount of time goes into making sure the comic isn't recognizable when it's done. All I need from the original is a color and pattern sample. If you can tell its origins, I've failed.

If you're the original artist, and you'd like the modified comic in question removed, please drop me a line and let me know which one(s). And please accept my most abject apologies if I've offended. For what it's worth, I only steal from the best. I'm pulling samples from the comics I've read and recommended to friends for years. In short, the webcomic artists who are doing it right, not the ones this project was originally intended to satirize. It's kind of a sideways compliment, really.

Yeah, I know. That sounds lame to me, too. Basically, if it pisses you off, I'll take it down PDQ. Just let me know.

So what's with this "Gravel: Take Two" nonsense?
Ah! See, that's the hook. If you come back in a few days, you'll see that the relaunch date automagically pushes itself back. I know it makes me the king of the script kiddies, but I'm kind of proud of that coding.

So where do you go from here?
Well, I plan on keeping up with the pseudo-comics, and their associated excuses, for quite a while yet. I plan on coming up with the associated side-business of a webcomic, too. I would consider this project a resounding success if I received actual gift art and guest strips (although not of the SOF-JPEG variety- get your own gag!).

Oh, come off it, you egomaniac! Who'd do that?
Well, nobody. Not unless they wanted in on the gag, too. Every extra piece lends that much more credibility to the scam. Naturally, I'd host it and include links back to the artist's webpage. Do I seriously expect anything? No, of course not! But it would be pretty cool.

Well, that's about it. If you have any questions or suggestions about the project, now that the cat is out of the bag, send me a message at the Contact address above. You might mention that you found the Secret FAQ, so I know you're in on the gag.