Did you notice the typo on [isnert comic here]?
Yes. I did. You don't need to e-mail me about it. Really. They're all part of an ongoing subliminal plot designed by Bob himself. Just let them wash over you and sink into your subconscious. It'll be easier that way. Fnord.

Fnord? Oh, come on! Hasn't the Illuminatus! thing been done to death by now?
You saw the fnord?!? Clearly, your training and assimilation is incomplete. The Men in Black will arrive shortly to escort you to the re-education facility. Please cooperate, or they'll have to use the orbital mind control lasers.

Didn't you notice the inconsistency in [insert comic here]? That could never happen! What about the [insert ostensibly devastating argument here]?
Well it wasn't a mistake, of course! As mentioned before, the answer is very simple: Bob wanted it that way. You know, Bob? The mutant mind controlling telekinetic goldfish? If anything appears illogical or inconsistent, just assume Bob's mind control is responsible.

Yeah. Bob's mind control. That's it.

Why can't I see the comics?
The comics are in SOF-JPEG format. SOF-JPEG is a relatively new image compression scheme that gives all the disk space savings of a JPEG, without the artifacts and loss of detail inherent in that older, more primitive format. All reasonably current browsers should be able to view them just fine.

However, as I understand it, there was a narrow range of browser releases that came shipped with SOF-JPEG encoding turned off for some reason. I've never heard an adequate explanation as to why. If you're having trouble viewing the comics, check your Advanced tab under Tools, Internet Options (or wherever it is that you folks using obscure alternative web browsers keep your advanced settings nowadays) and turn on SOF-JPEG decoding.

I'm afraid that's all I know about this issue. Sorry for the inconvenience.

Why haven't you answered my e-mail?
Maybe it's because I'm completely backlogged. I get a lot of e-mails in a given day, but I try to get to them all.

Or maybe it was snagged by my spamfilter. If your name is Jose Viagra or Jane Cialis, well, sorry. Maybe you could use snailmail?

Or maybe I just don't like you.

I want to support your work! Where can I buy a Gravel t-shirt/coffee mug/mousepad/condom?
Thank you! I appreciate it. Unfortunately, I haven't found a suitable custom tchotchke supplier yet. (Addendum March 30, 2004: Please don't send me links to this or that print shop! I'm in negotiations with a couple of potential vendors now.) In the meantime, feel free to give me cash if the spirit moves you. Tens and twenties, old bills please. Drop me a line, and I'll tell you where and when.

Why do you do this?
To blow off steam and help me deal with my life, mostly. My therapist said it was healthier than Robitussin addiction, and my lawyer told me I couldn't beat another arson rap, so this seemed like the best third choice.

That, and I enjoy the fame, fortune, and respect that making a webcomic brings.

Dang. I almost managed to type that with a straight face.

Are your characters based on real people?
Some of them.

Physically, Joan is based pretty closely on my girlfriend (Addendum 4/13/04: ex-girlfriend... grrrr). Personality-wise, she's the closest thing to me in the comic. I guess I'm feeling up my feminine side. Or something like that. Joan is essentially the voice of the cartoonist... Except when she isn't.

Rhonda is an amalgam of several women, both from real life and from television/movies. There's a substantial portion of my adolescent fantasies in there, as well. She's what I wanted in a woman before I grew up and realized what I wanted in a woman. I don't think I could keep up with her now, assuming I ever could. Otherwise, she's primarily a foil for Joan.

Janey isn't based on anyone in particular. She's the local avatar of childhood innocence and optimism. Basically, I take my attitudes and opinions on a given topic, and think of the exact opposite. That's how I make a Janey.

Roger is based on a couple of coworkers, much to my continuing chagrin. Ernest is essentially me, as perceived from the outside. Except he has more hair and less gut.

Bob and Ralph are mostly created from whole cloth, although they do owe a substantial debt to the Brothers Warner.

What color is Rhonda's hair?
This week? Who knows. I doubt even she remembers what color it was originally.

Where did Bob and Ralph get their mental powers?
Radioactive aquarium gravel. Thus the title of the comic. Oh, stop looking at me like that. If it fits your worldview better, the other 20 goldfish in the tank died of radiation sickness and brain tumors, and the pet shop was soon shut down by the local ASPCA.

How do you make the comics?
With some pencils, some ink, a computer, and a considerable amount of swearing. Specifics vary by comic.

Can I link to you on my website?
Of course! Thanks! If you'd like, here's a couple of link buttons.